


I'll be home for Christmas

by Cormyay



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: A lot of fluff and a little angst, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Holiday Reunion, Holiday Shenanigans, I regret nothing though, I took all the toothrotting tropes and put it in one fic, M/M, Modern AU, Mutual Pining, Rated E for later chapters, Sharing a Bed, alternating pov, these poor boys are bad at feelings but they'll get there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-09-12 14:25:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9076390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cormyay/pseuds/Cormyay
Summary: Hux has been working at the same company for four years now after moving to America and getting away from his family. It's been a year now since his peaceful lifestyle was changed when Snoke brought on Kylo Ren. He hated the man at first but without rhyme or reason, it's changed to something akin to love. So when Kylo asks him to be his fake boyfriend and go to his family Christmas get together he can't really say no, what's that worst that could happen?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope everyone had a great holiday! I'm looking forward to the New Year as I'm sure everyone else is. I was inspired by a Tumblr post mentioning all these tropes being in one fic and now here I am, it kinda got out of hand. Hope you enjoy!! :)

"Explain this to me again please, you need my help with what?" he's trying not to get irritated and takes another swig of his whiskey. He should have known something was up when Kylo offered to buy him a drink after work.

"Alright so my mom always bugs me about finding someone and she was threatening to set me up with people or make me an online profile for a dating website," Kylo says before taking another sip of his own drink, "she wants me to be happy and has some irrational fear that I'm going to die alone, she acts like 25 is the end of my life or something".

"I knew your mother was pushy but that just seems excessive," Kylo's mentioned often about how difficult his family can be to him and Phasma. His own family was controlling but not for the sake of his happiness,"I still don't understand what I have to do with all of this".

Kylo starts to avoid eye contact as he continues and that's never a good sign, "she was nagging me a couple weeks ago about it so I told her I was already dating someone, she asked who and I just said someone I work with. My family is having their annual Christmas week getaway and she's expecting me to bring the person I'm dating. You don't have to answer right away just think about it, but I know she'll figure out I was lying if someone doesn't come with me," Kylo takes a deep breath after speaking all of it.

Kylo isn't giving him much of a way out of going and gives him a hard look, "you're an imbecile".

"Thanks, Hux, you're so supportive."

"You're the one who got yourself into this mess why should I have to help you out of it?"

"Will you please just come with me? Phasma said you don't go to see your family during the holidays and it's only for a week. You just have to play the part so my mom will be content that I'm not going to die alone," something that looks mischievous crosses Kylo's face, "plus you'd also be helping me make my goody two shoe ex that will be there jealous".

He knows Kylo is just trying to play into his love of drama, "and what makes you think I could even do that?"

"Hux, please, you look like some kind of Gaelic diety".

"That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard you say and if you're trying to butter me up into agreeing to go you'll need to try harder," he downs the rest of his drink hoping Kylo will believe it's the reason for the burning on his cheeks.

"Everything will be paid for; food, plane ticket and whatever else comes up".

"Plane ticket?" he asks as casually as he can. He doesn't always do well on planes, but now he's really curious as to where this gathering is taking place.

Kylo smirks he must think he's won, "oh did I forget to mention it's in Denver, Colorado?"

"Hmmmm," he hasn't ever been and it's tempting. 

"My parents have a lodge up in the mountains right off a ski slope. We'd have our own room, two queen size beds, and all the alcohol you could want."

Hux considers it, he hasn't really had a vacation since he moved to New York from England 4 years ago, "I wouldn't have to pay for anything?" Kylo shakes his head no, "I won't have to make any plans or decisions?" he shakes his head again, Hux pinches the bridge of his nose, "fine, fine alright, I have vacation days I've been needing to use. You cannot say I never do anything for you anymore."

"Thank you, Hux! You're my savior," Kylo wraps him in his arms and he can't stop the blush from spreading on his face, "my family can be a little overwhelming so it'll be nice to have someone with me as back-up".

"Phasma is not going to be happy about us both being gone for a week you know".

When Hux gets home he slumps onto the couch and sighs. Now that he's alone he thinks he really should have thought this whole thing through some more before giving Kylo an answer. Kylo had seemed so desperate though, he didn't have to tell Hux that he was his only hope. He can't go back on it now, not after seeing the look of relief on Kylo's face.  
They've been working together for about a year now. When Snoke first hired Kylo and he started working for the company he'll admit he hated him. The man was quick to getting frustrated, expected things because of the family he comes from and lacked some basic social skills. He was like a thundercloud of emotions that swept in and disrupted he and Phasma's carefully crafted system.

After working directly alongside him and becoming closer friends with Kylo he sees more to the man. That Kylo wants to break past what his family expects of him and feels he has a lot to prove, something he can relate to. That he tries to hide his emotions behind sarcasm and is actually rather sensitive to what others think of him. He also hides a gentleness to him behind his dark clothes and tough appearance.

Then somehow along the way, Hux starting having feelings for him. He knows it's only fleeting, Kylo doesn't seem to have any feelings for him and that's fine. He would rather keep their friendship the way it is, he just wants Kylo to be happy. Anyways they work together and it would only cause problems for their working relationship as well if things went sour.  
Phasma is not going to be happy to take on both of their responsibilities for a week. He'll owe her something, maybe he can bribe her with a good bottle of wine.

 

===

 

The next day they're eating lunch together at a restaurant nearby during their lunch break like usual, "so you know your family is going to ask you questions right?"

"What do you mean?" Kylo says around a mouth full of food, he can't be that dense.

He holds back a sigh, "they're going to want to know how we started "dating", how long, that kind of thing".

"Oh, yeah you're right," he sets his fork down, "um, well, what should our story be?"

He should have known Kylo didn't have much of this planned out, "does most of your family know we work together? Have you ever mentioned my name before?"

"Yes I do, so they'll know we've been working together," Kylo just says matter of factly.

Oh, a little unexpected, "what have you said about me?"

Kylo starts to seem a little nervous, "not much, I mean I just talk about work and you and Phasma to them sometimes".

"Okay, well that helps, it'll make it more believable and I assume that means you're out to your family?"

"Yes, they kinda figured that out when I dated Poe a few years ago," Kylo looks reluctant to expand upon his past relationship so he won't prod for details.

"And you haven't dated anyone since him right?"

"No, I haven't dated anyone since him. So it's been like five years, which is why my mom is on my case."

"Oh."

"You don't have to say it like that, there's nothing wrong with me you know," he says defensively as he slides his plate into the trash can by their table.

"I didn't say there was, its the same for me. I haven't dated anyone since coming to America," he admits.

"Really? I just thought you were private about that kind of thing," that seems to reassure him.

"Yes, so calm down. Alright so I'm the one who asked you out on a date, we-" Kylo interrupts him.

"Why's it got to be you who initiated?"

"You know it'll be more believable," Kylo doesn't say anything probably realizing he's right, "so I took you to a nice restaurant, it was romantic. Candles and wine the whole experience,"

"Sounds nice," Kylo says as he smiles and props his head on his hand.

"It's supposed to Kylo," he fails in not rolling his eyes, it'd be nice though if it had actually happened. He's just trying to see this as another project he's working on, "so we've been dating for what 2 months now?"

"That should work, I told my mom a couple weeks ago that we started dating," which Hux still wants to know why him? But he guesses Kylo just took the easy route.

"Alright, so by Christmas we'll have been dating for 3 months. A little hand holding and endearments and you'll be in the clear."

"I knew you were the right choice Hux this will actually be believable."

"Of course, and I'm looking forward to relaxing next to a fireplace and drinking the week away," he'll probably need to drink just to get through some of the week.

"I'll have to remember that all it takes to bribe you is booze and a fireplace," Kylo chuckles.

He places his hand over Kylo's and leans in, "it may take a little bit more than that next time darling," Kylo looks down at their hands and then back up to him a little red in the cheeks. Hux takes his hand away, "come on Kylo you'll need to get used to a little of this if we're going to pull it off".

"Right, you're right, sorry."

"I think we should agree now, no kissing on the lips, it'll seem too forced and awkward," and admits to himself that he wouldn't be able to handle that kind of closeness, "you can just tell your family I don't like PDA".

"Okay, yeah of course," he's usually good at reading people and would almost think Kylo sounds disappointed.

"Is there anything I should know before I meet your family?"

Kylo looks away lost in thought for a moment and then grits his teeth, "Kylo Ren isn't my real name," he mumbles.

"What?"

"My real name is Ben okay, Ben Organa-Solo, I know my family's going to call me that so you should know," he says and crosses his arms.

"That's adorable," he always thought Kylo Ren was a strange name, though it fit him.

"No, it's not," he growls out.

"Calm down Benjamin," he smirks at Kylo before letting out a small sigh, "well I guess it's only fair you know my first name as well, it's Armitage," he always goes by his last name and really only Phasma and Snoke know his full name.

"That's like the most British thing I've ever heard," and Kylo's smile is back.

"Yes well I hate it and no one else needs to know, am I clear?"

"Yes, yes don't worry."

He takes out his phone to take notes, "so what's the timeline?" he likes to have things planned out and even if Kylo is supposed to be doing all the planning he doesn't trust his scatterbrain sometimes.

"We leave on the 20th, our flight is at 7 am and I'll come by to pick you up. Our flight back is on Monday morning the 26th and then we'll still have the 27th off before we have to go back to work on the 28th. Sound good General?" he drawls it out expecting Hux to have asked for the details.

He still doesn't know if he likes or hates the nickname Kylo and Phasma gave him, "sounds good, it's nice to see you so organized for a change".

"As if I had a choice," Kylo says as they both get up to leave and get back to work.

 

===

 

It's the night before he and Kylo leave to go to Colorado and he had invited Phasma over to his apartment for dinner. As what she claims is simply bribery, but he mostly wanted her company to help calm his nerves about the week ahead.

"Are you really sure it's a good idea to go Hux?" Phasma asks clearly concerned as he begins to walk her to the door after finishing dinner and drinks. She had mentioned it while they were eating but he'd changed the subject. The way she blocks the door now leaves no room for escaping the subject.

"I don't know honestly, but I couldn't tell him no," he really should have.

"I don't understand why you just won't tell him how you feel, what's the worst that could happen?"

"Oh, besides him out right rejecting me," he sighs heavily, "I don't want to risk ruining our friendship, I'd rather continue on like this than do that."

"You also need to think about your own feelings," she has her work face on that leaves no room for argument.

"We both know I don't have feelings," he tries to make it light.

"You can act like this coldhearted person all you want but I know it's not true. You should let Kylo see that part of you too," she gives him a small hug before reaching for the door handle.

"Thank you for your advice, and for not being too mad at me for taking all this time off."

"Oh I'm not mad, but you do owe me big time and more than just that amazing bottle of wine you served me," she smirks at him before opening the door to his apartment, "and keep me updated I'm curious to see if Kylo's family is as crazy as he makes them out to be".

"Of course, I'll let you know as soon as I arrive, mum."

 

===

 

"Hux, don't you think you should slow down? I know you said you would drink the week away but the plane hasn't even taken off yet," Kylo tells him as he opens a second mini bottle of whiskey. He really hates flying, he doesn't know why he thought it would be different this time. He should have taken something before getting on.

"This is only my second drink, what does it matter what I'm doing anyways?" he doesn't mean for it to come out so irritated.

"Are you...nervous about flying?"

"I'm fine," he'll be fine, once they're in the air he'll be fine he tells himself.

"You don't have to lie to me Hux, you always snap at people when you get nervous or anxious, also you won't stop bouncing your leg," Kylo points at his leg.

He immediately stills himself, "fine, I don't like flying, every time I do I think I'll be fine but then I get on a plane and I can't help it".

"What can I do?"

"I don't know, distract me, just keep talking," he resists the urge to start bouncing his leg again.

"Talk about what?"

"That's your job to figure out," he slams back the last of his drink.

"Here just listen to some music, it always calm me down," he watches Kylo take out his phone and flick through his music.

Kylo starts to hand him his headphones but he pushes them away, "I'm not listening to your goth music".

"I don't listen- just take the headphones," Kylo puts them over his ears before he can protest, what he hears isn't what he expected. It starts off with classical music and the melody is immediately soothing and he finds himself closing his eyes. After a couple of songs by Mozart and Bach, Adele starts playing. He knows Kylo doesn't listen to this kind of music, so why does he have it on his phone, unless...he downloaded it just for him. He doesn't realize the plane has started to take off until he's rocked in his seat. He squeezes his eyes harder and claws his hands into the armrests.

There's a calming hand on his, rubbing back and forth in a soothing way. He controls his breathing and soon the plane is in the air and settles. It's another moment before he opens his eyes. He sees Kylo still using his right hand to rub over his because his left is being crushed in Hux's grip. He lets go and removes the headphones, "sorry, I thought it was the armrest, you should have shaken me off".

"It helped and I'll be fine," he sounds so calm.

"Why are you so okay with flying?"

"My dad has a pilot's license and took me flying all the time as a kid," Kylo makes a small smile as he seems to reminisce, then furrows his brows, "you should try to get some sleep it's a long flight".

"And what will you do?" he hands the headphones back to Kylo.

"I can keep myself entertained, I've learned how to over the years," it comes out sadder than he thinks Kylo meant to.

Hux instead pulls out some paperwork and tries to do some work he brought along with him. He sees Kylo just rolls his eyes at him before putting on his headphones and looks out the window. Hux doesn't really notice he's tired before he falls asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the lovely comments!! Please enjoy the next chapter :)

When Kylo first asked Hux to come with him to Colorado he honestly expected a flat out no. Now here he is on a plane flying to Colorado with Hux to see his family. He hasn't seen his family in awhile and while he talks to his mom often he just doesn't really feel like he belongs sometimes

He decided to go to college for engineering and his dad had been a little upset with him about not taking on the family business. He would rather build planes than fly them and he feels deep down that his father wouldn't have truly trusted him with the business anyways. It doesn't matter, his dad has all the help he could want with Poe working with him. And even though Rey is only fifteen she's a natural and well on her way to helping run the company some day too.

He tries not to be bitter, he likes where he works and what he does. When he first started working for Snoke his mother was against it. Being in politics she has a lot of connections and doesn't believe that Snoke has completely good intentions. He can only reassure her that things are fine and that if he has any problems he'll let her know.

He likes the people he works with, Mitaka can be over anxious sometimes but he gets things done even under pressure. Phasma doesn't take shit from anyone and it was refreshing to meet someone who wasn't intimidated by him. Then there's Hux, who when he first met the man felt he was the equivalent of a black hole, void of any emotions. Everything from his work to his appearance has to be precise and orderly. It was frustrating when Hux would give him simple tasks as if he didn't trust him to do things right and they often butted heads.

It wasn't until working for First Order Industries for a couple of months that his opinion of Hux changed. Phasma had invited him out with her and a few others to get drinks. They would be watching some football world cup, he didn't follow the sport but he needed to blow off some steam. She hadn't mentioned Hux would be coming and he expected Hux didn't even know how to have fun anyways. 

He nearly dropped his phone when he walked into the pub and the first thing he saw was Hux and Phasma jumping out of their chairs to cheer at the TV. While he had been pretty sure Hux wasn't actually a robot, it was shocking to see him so animated. His hair was down and across his forehead and he was smiling and laughing. He had never realized how truly handsome Hux was until that moment. Phasma had then called out to him when she noticed him at the door. When Hux had noticed him there it was as if a switch and been flipped Hux seemed to retreat back into himself. He tried not to let it affect him as he sat with everyone. He didn't expect it to hurt as much as it did that Hux could actually be so open but chose not to around him.

He had watched Hux get up to go to the bar and decided to get a drink for himself as well, and stood next to Hux at the bar. It's not like he didn't know the man, but he hadn't known what to even talk about if it wasn't about work,  "game going well?"

"As well as it can, I know they can play better than they are though," he saw Hux side glance at him, "Phasma didn't tell me you would be coming".

"I guess it was last minute," while Hux was focused on the T.V. he had taken the opportunity to really look at Hux, "you're so different outside of work".

"What's that supposed to mean?" Hux's voice was laced with anger.

"I mean...you're just usually so serious at work, but you actually have a really nice smile," he still doesn't know why he blurted that out. 

After he had Hux had looked right at him like he was both crazy and stupid. He had certainly felt like both.

For the rest of the night, he kept catching Hux glancing at him with an irritated look. He'd thought for sure he'd gone and offended him somehow. At work the next day though it was like all the tension they'd had between them was gone. He didn't question it and ever since then they began to hang out more and became really good friends. After getting to know Hux better he can tell now that Hux has more emotions and feelings than he lets on but closes himself up for some reason. 

Hux still doesn't talk about himself very often but he wants to know more. What was his childhood like, what are his dreams, what makes him happy? Somewhere along the way, his resentment for Hux turned into something of a crush. He knows Hux doesn't feel the same way, but he's content with keeping things the way they are. He's happy to have Hux as a friend, and besides, there's no way someone like Hux would want to be with someone like him. He deserves someone more mature, someone, who has their life together and better control of their emotions. Even now he still doesn't really know if it was a good idea to bring Hux along as a fake boyfriend. He had honestly just wanted his mom off of his case and now just hopes he can get through this week.

He had to roll his eyes when Hux brought out paperwork on the plane, of course, the workaholic would bring his work with him. It's probably a good distraction for him though. Phasma had mentioned to him that Hux might have trouble so he'd downloaded some music he knows Hux likes. Music has always helped calm himself down and go to another place for a moment and it worked to do the same for Hux.

He's still looking out the window when he feels something on his shoulder. He turns his head slightly to see Hux's head starting to droop and lean on him. He doesn't move or say anything and soon Hux is sleeping soundly on him. Without all the stoic indifference on his face, he looks so young, peaceful and it pulls at his heart. He's never really seen Hux this up close before, he notices now the light freckles and how translucent his eyelashes are. This is bad, he wills himself to keep looking out the window and not think about anything.

He falls asleep at some point as well, because before he knows it he's jostled awake by the plane. Hux bolts awake and he holds back a snort at Hux's hair sticking up. The landing isn't as bad as take off and Hux calms down quickly as they make their way out of the plane. Once they collect their bags it's around two o'clock and it's close to the time he told his mom he would arrive.

"Who's meeting us here?" Hux asks as he wraps a dark green scarf around his neck and he knows Hux already has three layers on.  
  


"My dad should be picking us up," he starts looking around the airport but he doesn't spot his father.  
  


"Benny!," he turns around at the sound of that voice to see BB running across the room towards them and jumps into his arms.  
  


"BB what are you doing here?" his mom hadn't mentioned they would be here, it's been almost a year and a half since he's seen them. They always looked up to him for some reason and that always made Poe jealous...Poe...she really sent Poe to pick them up, he tries not to seem irritated in front of BB as he asks, "where's your brother?"  
  


"Dunno, who's this?"  
  


"This is Hux, he's my special friend."  
  


"Hello BB," he knows Hux doesn't especially like children but he still gives them a warm smile.  
  


"Hello, Hux," with BB missing a couple of front teeth, the 'H' in his name comes out sounding a little like an 'F' and he can't help but laugh at the look on Hux's face.  
  


"BB I told you not to go running across the airport," Poe says cross as he walks up and BB starts to pout a little.  
  


He sees Poe looking Hux up and down and he feels a twinge of possessiveness, "Hux this Poe, Poe, this is Hux".  
  


"Nice to meet you," he feels relieved when Hux gives Poe his fake business smile.  
  


"Nice to meet you too," Poe says and then it's awkward for a moment.  
  


"Well I'm ready to get out of this airport can we go?" they start walking towards the exit and Kylo shifts his grip, "you've gotten so big BB".  
  


"Well I am eight now, I'm grown ups," they say confidently.  
  


"Oh, are you now? Well, I guess that means you're too old for Santa to come visit this year?"  
  


"No! I'm not too olds for that!" he has to laugh again at the panic that crosses BB's face.  
  


"Oh, okay good then," he lets them down and they all get into the car after they load their luggage into the back of it. He and Hux sit in the back, and he has to ask, "why'd my mom send you?," he tries to make it sound casual instead of bitter.  
  


"Well I had to make sure the prodigal son returned safe and sound," Poe says like he was put out, so everyone else was too busy then.  
  


"Hmmm," he decides the view out the window is more important than continuing on a conversation with Poe.  
  


"So Hux, I heard you work with Ben?"  
  


"Yes, Kylo and I work together," Hux emphasizes his name, Poe and Hux exchange a look in the rearview mirror, " from the first time I saw him I knew one day he would be mine," if only that were actually true. After their small interaction, the rest of the car ride is thankfully quiet.

Poe parks the car and they all start getting out, "Leia's starting dinner, but the rest are up on the slopes, come on BB lets go see if Aunt Leia needs any help".  
  


"Oh no, go on ahead we don't want any help with our bags," he mumbles under his breath as he gets his and Hux's luggage out of the back of the car.  
  


"I don't like him," Hux says as he watches the two go into the house.  
  


"That's like the nicest thing you've ever said to me," it really is, his worst fear was Hux leaving with Poe at the end of the week.  
  


"Really? I could have sworn I've complimented your choice of clothing before."  
  


"Sarcastically doesn't count," he says as he starts handing Hux is bags.  
  


"Oh my apologies," he says as he slings his messenger bag over his shoulder, "you carry my other bag".

"Why do I have to carry it? You have a free hand."

"Yes, but don't you think it'll look better if you act the doting boyfriend who carries my bag?"

"You're going to milk this for all its worth aren't you?"

"You go to the gym all the time correct, you're stronger than me."

"Fine, and don't think that counts as a compliment either."

They make it to the door and his mom rushes to meet him as soon as he opens it. He drops the bags and she hugs him tight as he bends himself a little to wrap his arms around her, "it's so good to see you, Ben, I've missed you so much," she's a little teary eyed and it makes him feel guilty for not visiting her more often.

 

"I've missed you too mom," he squeezes her tight again before letting her go.  
  


She looks to Hux and smiles at him, "you must be Hux?"  
  


"Yes ma'am, it's a pleasure to finally meet you Mrs. Organa," he goes to put his hand out for a handshake but she bats it away and leans in to give him a hug. He looks slightly uncomfortable at the contact.  
  


"Call me Leia, I've heard so much about you," his mom pulls back and squeezes Hux's arms.  
  


"Only good things I hope," Hux looks to him and Kylo decides now is a good time to take the bags up to their room.  
  


"Oh, Kylo let me help you with the bags," Hux says and he has to turn and roll his eyes so no one will see.

"It's alright babe I've got'em," he grabs both their bags and waits for his mom to lead the way.

"Thank you, darling," Hux smirks at him as he walks by and he wants to slap it off his face.

He trails behind the two as they take the stairs. His mom has an arm looped around Hux's and he can hear her saying how happy she is that he could come. She stops them short, this isn't the usual room he stays in.

When they enter the room there's only one bed and panic hits him, "mom I thought all the lodge rooms had two beds".  
  


"Most of them do, but your uncle Cepo decided to come last minute and needed a bed. Since the two of you are together I thought it wouldn't be a problem to put you guys in this room?"  
  


"But-" he starts to protest but Hux takes over.  
  


Hux loops his arm around his, "of course not Leia, this room is lovely and I couldn't have imagined a nicer view either,"  
  


"So good to hear, now get unpacked and make yourselves comfortable and we'll have dinner around five, okay?"  
  


He bends down slightly so she can give him a kiss on the cheek, "okay, thank you, mom".  
  


"Thank you, Leia."  
  


Once the door is shut Hux removes his arm and moves to throw his bag on the bed, "just so we're clear I'm not the one who's sleeping on the floor or the couch".  
  


"I'm not either," he says a little too quickly.  
  


Hux turns to face him, looks at the bed and then back to him, "so we're sharing the bed then?"   
  


"It-its plenty big for the both of us to have our own space," neither one of them will fit on the couch and it would be stupid for one of them to sleep on the floor.  
  


"I suppose it shouldn't be a problem," Hux seems hesitant to agree.  
  


"Sorry, I know this isn't what you agreed to," he doesn't always sleep well and he's trying to keep his nerves under control.  
  


"It should be fine, just stay on your side,"  
  


"I will.Well we still have a couple of hours before dinner so I'm going to lay down for a minute,"   
  


"Alright I'm going to call Phasma and let her know we're here,"

He takes the left side of the bed while Hux goes on the balcony. He just needs to close his eyes for a minute.

"..lo"..."kylo".."Kylo!" he startles awake gripping the blankets and blinks awake to see a concerned Hux, "sorry, I didn't mean to alarm you. I'm just waking you up because it's already four-thirty and I wanted you to have time to get ready".

He sits up on the bed and watches Hux as he crosses the room. He's showered and impeccably dressed without a hair out of place. He had planned on just going down the way he is.

"You didn't need to get all dressed up you know."

"I'm meeting most of your family for the first time," Hux looks away while he fixes his sleeve cuffs, "either way, I felt the need to shower after being cramped on the plane with all those other people. Who knows what kind of germs were running rampant in there."

"You're ridiculous," he goes to get ready himself but just ends up straightening his clothes out and running a hand through his hair.

When they go down to the dining room only a few people are already there. They quietly enter the room and he sees his parents have put out wine so he makes Hux and himself a glass. 

He nearly drops his own glass when someone claps him on the shoulder, "hey son".

"Hey dad," he says and turns to face him.

"Sorry I didn't meet you at the airport, Lando wanted to go up to the slopes for a little bit, everyone ended up coming and I lost track of time."

"No problem," he's used to everything and everyone coming before him. Jobs, business and political meetings, friends; they all seem to come before him, "dad I'd like you to meet Hux, Hux this is my dad Han".

"Nice to meet you kid, Leia's told me a lot about you," he loves his mom but he really wishes she could keep some things to herself.

"Pleasure to meet you, sir," with Hux's manners and appearance he's surprised no one has already questioned the fact that they are actually a legitimate couple.

"Just call me Han, no need for manners here," he shakes Hux's hand.

"Apologies, old habits die hard I suppose."

"Were you in the military?"

"No, but my father was. I went to a military academy during my school years and my father was the commandant so a lot was expected of me," Hux says without any emotion on his face. Hux has never really gone into detail about his family, he only knows that they didn't get along at all.

His dad looks little unsure of what to say to that, "well don't worry about any of that here, we're all family and we don't take too much seriously around here. I'm going to go find your mom and see if she needs any more help finishing dinner."

"Alright," his dad walks away and he shifts back towards Hux, "sorry I know you don't like talking about your family,"

"It's fine, I had to expect your family would ask me questions," they move to stand near the Christmas tree and no one really notices them as everyone starts gathering in the room. Hux gives him an incredulous look after scanning the room, "your family certainly knows some...interesting looking people".

 

"Yeah, they've always traveled a lot and picked up friends along the way. We never really stayed in one place until I became a teenager."  
  


"So tell me who's who," it almost feels like they're at a work gathering and they need to get info on their potential clients.  
  


He leans in closer to Hux, and first points to the huge guy next to his dad, "that's Uncle Chewie," Hux raises his eyebrow at him, "I don't know how he got the nickname, but he and my dad have been friends forever and used to own a transporting company together."  
  


"The name kind of fits him somehow."  
  


"The guy next to him his Uncle Lando, also long time friend of my dads. Next to him is his nephew Finn, he's a good kid and Lando always brings him here for Christmas. Then the guy in the gold jacket is Cepo, he's a little strange, it's like he's always expecting the worst to happen."   
  


"How many uncles do you have?"  
  


"They're like family so that's just what I call them. I didn't grow up with many people my own age. Next to my mom is her twin brother, my Uncle Luke and the girl next to him is Rey. She was the granddaughter of a long time family friend and mentor to my Uncle. Her parents passed away when she was young so my Uncle Luke adopted her, I consider her family too. She's been through a lot but she's tough,"  
  


"So that one is actually your uncle," Hux sounds like he's getting tired of keeping up with everything.  
  


"Yes."  
  


"So are you going to tell me about Poe, who seems to currently be sending glares this way?"  
  


He lets out a deep sigh, "we grew up together, his family was our neighbor for a long time. About a year after I graduated high school we tried dating. My mom was so happy because she already considered him a son but I guess I wasn't what he...wasn't good enough..I guess...just...I'd rather not talk about it," he says before downing the rest of his glass of wine.  
  


A dark look crosses Hux's face as he leans in, "so you said you wanted to make him jealous right?"   
  


"What? No, I was joking, I didn't really mean that," he tries not to visibly swallow as Hux leans in even closer to him. He can feel Hux's breath on his ear and his heart starts to race.  
  


"Oh, come on Kylo it'll be fun," he kisses Kylo's cheek and he feels his face instantly heat up, "see he already looks crosser," Hux pulls back and lets out a laugh that only he'll recognize as a devious one and makes that smile that drives him crazy.  
  


"Hey, the two lovebirds over there," they both look up at Rey, "are you going to introduce us to your friend?"  
  


Now everyone is looking at them, "everyone, this is my boyfriend Hux," and awkwardly motions to him.  
  


Hux takes his hand to hold, "hello, it's a pleasure to meet all of you. Kylo here was just helping me to learn everyone's name".

He introduces Hux to everyone and they all talk to him a little. He doesn't have to do much talking himself as Hux tells the story of their first date and other details Hux is making up on the spot.

They're having dinner and at one point he notices Hux bouncing his leg under the table. Without thinking, he puts a hand on Hux's thigh to calm him down. Hux stops midsentence to look at him and he feels his face go red. He half expects Hux to slap his hand away but instead, he just continues on with his conversation. 

Dinner goes well as Hux wins everyone over with his charm. By the time they're done and back up to their room he's exhausted. He takes a shower at Hux's demand that he won't sleep in the same vicinity as him unbathed.

When he gets out the lights are off, save for a lamp on Hux's side of the bed. Hux is already in the bed sitting up in his pajamas on his phone. He looks so soft in this lighting and wearing light blue fleece pj's, it's almost too much to handle.

He doesn't wear pajamas, just whatever clothes are lying around when he gets out of the shower. Tonight he's just wearing black shorts and tanktop and suddenly feels exposed as Hux seems to look him up and down. 

"Are you ready to sleep?" he asks Hux to break the silence.

Hux looks away and clears his throat before answering, "yes," he puts his phone away as Kylo climbs into bed, "what are the plans for tomorrow?"

"Well there's not really an itinerary so we can just chill out and relax around here tomorrow," he suggests.

"Sounds good, it'll be nice to sleep in for a change."

"Yeah," they both sit there awkwardly before they both shift to lay down on the bed. They're both facing away from each other on their sides and there ends up being plenty of room between them.

"Goodnight Kylo," Hux says as he turns off the lamp by his side of the bed.

"Goodnight Hux," as he starts to close his eyes he wonders what it would feel like to roll over and press himself against Hux. To feel his warmth and have his face being tickled by Hux's hair.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to say after recent events some of these scenes were/will be hard to write. I know our space mom wouldn't want us to be sad though, but to keep smiling and loving life. Though I didn't know her personally I'll miss her and all the brightness she brought to this world.
> 
> Also I hope you like my interpretation of BB-8, they just have too much personality to not make them into a person :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this new chapter!

When Hux first arrived at the lodge he was surprised by the sheer size of the place. It's almost a mansion with two stories, multiple rooms, and a large living room complete with a grand fireplace. He hasn't seen any of the other rooms yet but the one Leia put them in could be an upscale New York apartment. When you first walk into the toom it has the main room with a queen bed that has a dresser on either side of it. To the left it has a master bath and to the right a small kitchenette, and to the far wall it has enormous windows that look out onto the mountains with a couch underneath. Anyone would kill for a place like this and they only use it a few weeks out of the year. 

Now that he's in bed the exhaustion from dinner and conversation catches with him. He didn't have family gatherings when he was growing up, he spent most holidays with his real mother before she passed away a few years ago. She thought he would have a better chance at a good future if he stayed with his father. During the holidays though it would be just the two of them, cooking and doing their own small traditions. Once she was gone there was no longer any reason to stay in England and he hasn't really celebrated the holidays since. Being around Kylo's family has him thinking about and missing her. Having so many people at one table laughing, carrying on and asking him questions about himself made him a little nervous, which Kylo seemed to notice. 

While he has experience networking and charming people for work, doing it with Kylo's family felt different. He really wanted to make a good impression with these people. He didn't realize that everyone that would be here would have such outgoing and charismatic personalities and he found it hard to keep up with. From anyone looking from the outside in he doesn't think most people would believe Kylo was related to any of them.  

He thinks Kylo was just as relieved as he was to get back up to the room. He chose the right side of the bed facing the windows without much fuss from Kylo. He's sitting up in bed setting an alarm on his phone when Kylo comes out of the bathroom from his shower. He glances towards Kylo and has to do a double take of him in a tank and shorts. He's not seen him in less than jeans and multiples layers. He didn't realize how broad Kylo's shoulders are compared to his narrower waist, or how muscular his thighs are. He's snapped out of his staring by Kylo clearing his throat and quickly looks back to his phone.  

"Are you ready to go to sleep?" Kylo asks him.

"Yes, what are the plans for tomorrow?" 

"Well there's not really an itinerary so we can just chill out and relax around here tomorrow," he suggests.

"Sounds good, it'll be nice to sleep in for a change," he's glad Kylo had the same thing in mind. 

They say their goodnights and both lay down facing away from one another. The bed is large enough for them to have plenty of room between the two of them. He can't remember the last time he had to share a bed with someone else. On the rare times he let someone come over he didn't let them stay the night. He was initially worried that it would be awkward sharing a bed with Kylo but he feels oddly comfortable. He wonders for a moment what it would feel like to have Kylo pressed against him, keeping him warm through the night. The sound of Kylo's steady breathing lulls him to sleep. 

The next thing he knows he feels like he's being dragged out of his sleep, it can't already be morning, he cracks open his eyes and he's right. He closes them and is almost asleep again when it happens again and he figures out what woke him up in the first place. Kylo's talking, he grits his teeth, if Kylo wants to take a call in the middle of the night he can do it somewhere else. 

He sits up in bed, "Kylo what the hell do you think-" 

He doesn't finish when he sees Kylo's eyes are closed, sometime during the night he's rolled over to face him and he's still asleep. He watches him for a moment and he starts talking again, it's nothing he can really make out just mumbling and incoherent noises. If he's having a bad dream maybe he should wake him up, he decides to and calls out to him, "Kylo," Kylo doesn't respond so he lightly shakes his shoulder, "Kylo?" 

Kylo curls in on himself, "whhhaaaat?" 

"It sounded like you were having a bad dream, you were talking in your sleep and woke me up."

He seems to go stiff before sitting up in bed too, "sorry," he won't look at him, "I just do that sometimes, I don't know why, I wasn't even dreaming about anything," that must be the reason why Kylo seemed to panic when he realized they would have to share a bed. He's relieved, he had worried that it was because of him, "I'll just sleep on the couch," Kylo says as he moves to get out of the bed. 

He stops Kylo with a hand on his shoulder, "Kylo it's okay, if you're fine it doesn't bother me," Kylo hasn't moved, he can understand how it might be an embarrassing thing to do, "alright? Just go back to sleep".

"Alright, sorry again," they both lay back down, he's learning more about Kylo than he ever thought he would.

 

 

The next time he's woken up it's from the feeling of Kylo getting out of the bed. He opens his eyes a little to see it's now morning but still too early for his liking. His eyes snap back open when he's almost flung off the bed by Kylo jumping onto it, "Hux get up!" he sounds frantic.

He feels an adrenaline rush as he sits up in bed, "what? What is it?" 

"It snowed last night," Kylo simply states as they stare at one another. Any other time Kylo's childish enthusiam would be endearing if it weren't for the fact that he wants to shove a pillow down his throat for waking him up like that. He lays back down and pulls the covers all the way over his head. 

"I've seen snow before it's nothing to wake me up about," he grinds out.

"Yeah but it's snow in Colorado on the week of Christmas," he can hear the pout in Kylo's voice. 

"I'm going back to sleep," he hears Kylo make a small laugh, "what's so amusing?" 

"Nothing, it's just I always thought you were a morning person. You're always so serious and ready to get stuff done at work as soon as you get there." 

"And your point," he feels himself growing irritable. 

"You're actually just grumpy in the mornings aren't you?" 

He clutches the pillow under his head and quickly throws it at Kylo's face who just catches it and laughs at him, "that tends to happen when you're awoken by almost being thrown off the bed". 

Kylo puts his hands up in surrender, "sorry, sorry," he hands the pillow back before standing up, "my mom should be making breakfast soon are you coming down?"

"I don't eat breakfast and I'm going back to sleep."

"Suit yourself grumpy."

When his alarm goes off at eleven, he still really doesn't feel too well rested. He gets up anyways and shaves and dresses before making his way downstairs. When he turns the corner everyone save for Kylo, Finn and BB are in the kitchen looking to be preparing lunch. They all turn to him and he feels like he has a spotlight on him. 

"Good morning Hux," Leia says first. 

"Good morning Leia, everyone," they all say a good morning before getting back to what they were doing. 

"Did you sleep well?" 

"Not really but I blame Kylo for that," when Poe turns and smirks at him he realizes how that sounded, "I mean he woke me up early all excited about it having snowed last night," he quickly adds.

"Yes he's always been one to get overly excited about things," she laughs to herself. 

"Do you know where he is right now?" 

"I think he and the other two are out back."

"Okay thank you, I'm going to go see what he's up to."

He bundles up, pulling on a scarf and his gloves too, before going out.  He used to have a pair of black leather gloves given to him by his mother but they were ruined in the move to America. The gloves he has now don't do much to keep his hands warm. Kylo had said they would be spending their time relaxing inside today, now here he is trudging through the snow. 

"Kylo!" 

"Yeah!" he can hear that the reply is coming from behind the lodge.  

"What are you even doing out here?!" 

"Come see!" it's Finn this time that answers, when Hux rounds the corner he sees now what they've been working on.

"Seriously?" they've somehow built a snowman that is almost as tall as Kylo and it's not even complete. All that's left to do is put the head on and it looks impossible, "how did the three of you even do this?" 

"It's a tradition Hux, every year we try to make it bigger," he looks so serious when saying it he almost snorts. 

"Yeah this one's waaaaay bigger than we made last year," BB says with such awe in their voice. 

"I have to say it's impressive, though I'm curious to see how you plan on getting that last ball on," Finn and Kylo look at one another and they clearly hadn't thought this through.  

"Oh well, you're just in time because I need your help for that," Kylo says with a smirk and he's so full of it. 

"Fine," with some effort the three of them get the head on to complete the snowman. Hux finds himself smiling as they put the coal, carrot and scarf onto the snowman. The only memories he has of building one was with his mother, he finds himself being rather sentimental today. 

"Hux are you actually smiling?" Kylo's voice is laced with sarcasm. 

"Shut up, I didn't get to do this much as a kid let me enjoy it." 

"You didn't build these all the time as a kid?" 

"Only a few times, my father frowned upon it, a better use of energy was shoveling snow not sculpting something out of it," he says as he puts the finishing touch on the snowman by wrapping the scarf around it. 

He's about to say something to wipe the sad look off of Kylo's face when a flurry of snow makes impact with the side of Kylo's head. They're shocked for a moment before they both look to where it came from. Han, Rey, and Poe are all standing near the lodge, both of the men point to Rey. 

"Nuh-uh it was not me! It was Uncle Han,"she points back towards Han. 

"Who are you going to believe? Your dad or this kid?" Han doesn't sound convincing at all. 

"The kid any day, this means war old man, I declare a snowball fight!" Kylo says as he shakes the snow out of his hair. 

"Hey who are calling old?" 

Kylo ignores the question as he looks towards Finn, "Finn you in?"  

"Yeah, let's do this." 

"Hux what about you?" 

"I don't really-" it doesn't like his idea of a good time but Kylo cuts him off. 

He yells up to the three by the lodge, "alright the three of us against the three of you!"

"You're on Benny!" Poe yells down to them. 

"Oh, we're crushing them," Kylo says as he clenches his fists, "BB can you be the referee and make sure no one cheats?" 

"Roger!" they salute before running up the hill. 

"We each get one minute to form your battle plans!" Kylo yells to the other three before hudling close to him and Finn, "alright, so I'm guessing you've never really done this either Hux?" 

"A few times in primary school." 

"Okay, so it's kinda like dodgeball, once you get hit you're out, last team standing wins." 

"Okay," he surveys the area a little before continuing, "if they're smart they'll probably go for the high ground to the right of the building near that group of trees and since they're closer they'll reach it first. So our best option is to head for that tree line and use it as cover. We'll take turns drawing them out and try flanking them from each side. Everyone clear?" 

"Of course General," Kylo smirks.

"Got it," Finn says as they break from formation. 

It's like a dramatic showdown as the three of them turn to the other team at the same time they turn to them. There's an exchange of glares and a 'I'm watching you' gesture from Rey and then everyone starts running at the same time. The other team takes high ground like he thought they would. Kylo and Finn both take a tree on either side of him and immediately snowballs start hitting the trees they're crouched behind, flurries of snow blocking their view. They take the oppurtunty to make ammo and wait for an opening to start throwing back. 

At the first sign of a pause Hux starts throwing towards them as Kylo weaves through the trees to get a closer shot. With all the snowballs flying their way they must not see Kylo getting closer. From where he's at he sees Kylo pull back to throw a snowball and almost immediately he hears Han yell out, "I've been hit". 

When Kylo looks back to him with a smirk he can't deny that this is the most fun he's had in a long time. Kylo weaves back through the trees to get back to his side, "one down" he says excitedly. Snowballs start making their way back towards them again but not very many. Even though the other team is one man down it still seems like a lot less than it should be. Hux pauses for a moment, snowball ready in his hand, he chances a look at where the other team was stationed. Like he thought only one person is throwing snowballs. 

Hux moves to get closer to Kylo and as he gets near he sees a flash of something through the trees. He's ready though and as soon as Poe sticks his head from around a tree he pushes Kylo down and throws a snowball straight into Poe's face. The ball Poe had thrown hits the tree above Kylo with a sad thump. 

The surprise on Poe's face is priceless, he wipes the snow off his face and smiles before calling out to Rey, "sorry Rey I'm down!" 

"Oh, come on!" She yells back exasperated.

They've got her on the ropes it's three against one and it'll be over soon, "nice shot Hux, I liked the part where you hit him right in the face," Kylo says a little to smugly. 

"I thought you might like that. So this should be quick, we just need to grab Finn and...where's Finn?" 

Finn is nowhere to be seen, there's no way he would have...and then he hears Rey again, "looks like it's two against two losers!" 

"Oh hell no," both he and Kylo look from around the tree to see the two teenagers sticking their tongues out, "you traitor!" Kylo yells out to them. 

They both slump against the tree, "well that was unexpected". 

"Not really, I think Finn totally has a crush on Rey," Kylo says as he packs a snowball, "well I'm ready to make some kids cry, you ready?" 

"Of course," they both nod at one another and back to back they start throwing balls towards the two. Snow makes impact with the tree they're behind but they both stay clear of it themselves, and then for a moment the onslaught stops. Hux motions towards a shed to the side of the lodge and they take the opportunity to start sneaking towards it. If they can move around it they can have a better vantage point. They make a bolt through the clearing for the small building and are able to make it without getting hit. Hux chances a glance in the direction the shots had been coming from and he didn't seen Rey, shit. 

Kylo's in front of him but he can't say something fast enough as Kylo makes the corner and he's hit right in the side. Kylo falls to the ground as Rey lets out a laugh, with a snowball ready he rounds the corner to strike but she's already run back into the tree line for cover. He lands on his knees next to Kylo, "I'm sorry, it was too late to warn you once I figured out what she was going to do," he catches his breath. 

Kylo makes an exaggerated cough and grips his side where he had been hit, "it's okay Hux, you just," another cough and Kylo grips his hand, "you just need to go on without me, don't let those traitors win". 

"My lord you're dramatic," Hux rolls his eyes at him. 

"Promise me Hux," he squeezes his hand tighter. 

"I promise," he says with as caring a face as he can make. He then takes the snowball he has in his hand and crams it into the side of Kylo's neck and partiallly down his shirt, "that's for waking me up early," Kylo yells out before trying to fling snow onto him and Hux can't help but laugh as he leaves him there laying in the snow. 

He approachs the corner peaking around it to see the two of them hiding behind a tree, "what did you do to him!?" Finn yells out. 

"I finished him off for you, now the two of you are next!"  

"You're a monster!" Rey yells back. 

He has the high ground now, he has a short staring contest with Rey before he starts looking around him. The tree next to him has a low hanging branch and he gets an idea. He dashes to get behind the tree and narrowly misses a hit. He crouches behind the tree and begins making smaller snowballs to fill his coat pockets with. He then quickly snaps the tree branch and grips it firmly in his hand. He peeks from around the tree and can tell the two are in the same spot loading up on ammunition. 

He walks out from behind the tree with the branch hidden underneathe his jacket and a hand in his pocket. He calmly starts walking towards them and it almost looks like a surrender. They both look at him like he's lost it, Rey smirks before standing and stretching her hand back, throwing a ball at him. 

In an instant he hits the ball out of the air with the branch and throws his own landing right at her stomach. He's certain he looks a mad man as he laughs at her shock, Finn immediately starts hauling balls his way. He blocks each one as he gets closer and closer, Finn is running out of ammo. He can see the surrender in Finn's face when he completely runs out. He stops about a foot away and simply throws one underhanded to land right on top of Finn's head. 

"Yeeeaaah!" Kylo shouts, he looks up to see that everyone is now outside having gotten curious about all the yelling going on. He suddenly feels so childish and drops the branch as they all start making their way back up the hill. 

"Nice game I guess," Rey mumbles to him. 

He makes a non-committal noise as they make it back to the lodge. Kylo gives him a hug but he doesn't really hug back like he knows he should. He glances to the older people in the group, he knows they don't care, that they aren't judging him. Yet he still feels his father's disapproving glare at him for acting so immature. Even without physically being here he's still somehow ruining things for him. 

"That was so fun to watch," Kylo's beaming at him, but he must be letting his worry show, "what's wrong?" Kylo says loud enough for everyone to hear. 

"Nothing," he says as he empties his pockets of the snowballs.

"Hux, c'mon you're allowed to have some fun."

"Hux honey, that's why we come to this place, to relax and have a good time. Please don't feel like you need to take things seriously," Leia says with some concern. 

"Yeah, we've had some great parties here too haven't we?" Lando says as he elbows Han and Leia gives a knowing look to the both of them. 

"Look I have no idea what he's talking about," Han really isn't good at lying. 

"Han please, I'm not stupid, alright you all look freezing who's ready for lunch and some hot chocolate?" 

"Aww yeah!" BB cheers. 

"Yes, I'm starving," Rey says as she tries to brush the snow out of Finn's hair. 

"You're always starving Rey," Poe says and then turns around to him to ask, "how were you even able to do that?" 

"He took fencing as a teenager and in college," Kylo says for him and he doesn't really remember ever mentioning that. 

"Well that explains it," Finn seems to pout. 

"That was so not fair," Rey crosses her arms. 

"Don't be jealous of his skills Rey. That was really awesome Hux, I haven't been able to beat those kids for a couple of years now." 

"Well that probably has to do with the fact that you just charge into things." 

"Whatever, we won and that's what matters."

The day ends without much more excitement, which he's thankful for and hopes tomorrow will go just as well. So far no one seems to question he and Kylo's relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to imagine that Hux is not a morning person and I am Hux in the mornings lol


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy the new chapter and thank you for reading! :)

"Absolutely not," Hux is standing in their room with his arms crossed.  

"Hux, come on you have to." 

"I don't have to do anything. I thought we agreed that I would be able to stay by the fire and drink all week, not once was skiing mentioned." 

"We're near a ski resort Hux," he says it as if exasperated and talking to a toddler. 

"That doesn't mean I have to go," and Hux in turn is kind of acting like one. 

"It'll be fun I promise, have you not ever skied before?"  

"No, I haven't and I'm not about to start at this age." 

"You're only 28, you're not some old man," he says as he starts putting his boots on, Hux is coming, his whole family is going up there today, "I'll teach you how and make sure nothing happens". 

"Nevertheless I don't want to." 

He didn't want to have to play this card, "it'll look suspicious if you don't you know and you did agree to make my family believe we're dating," Hux's glare seems to deepen, "all you have to do is come up to the slope with us, get in the skis for a little bit and then you're done I promise. Then we'll come back and we'll open up whatever expensive wine you want". 

Hux lets his arms fall and grits his teeth, "alrighhhht".  

"Don't growl at me" he can't help but laugh.  

He watches Hux begrudgingly bundle up in several layers before they head down to the living room. Everyone is ready to go up to the ski slopes and he gets themselves into the back of his parent's car.  

His mom turns around in the passenger seat to ask Hux, "is this your first time skiing?"  

"Yes ma'am it is, Kylo here as assured my safety, though," he smiles and Kylo reads it for what it is, he's pissed. He's seen it before when a proposal doesn't go well. 

"He has always been the protective one." 

"Mom please." 

"It's true," she turns back around in her seat, "there's a little bit of a learning curve but I'm sure you'll get the hang of it quickly". 

"Little learning curve my ass," his dad mumbles. 

"Han, don't be like that. He's just mad because he doesn't like the cold and he thinks I'm forcing him to go up there."  

"It would seem we have that in common then," they both share a look in the rear view mirror and the last thing he needs is his dad and Hux joining forces. 

The make it to the lodge at the bottom of the mountain and soon they're joined by everyone else. Kylo goes in to rent skis for Hux and a snowboard for himself. 

"You're snowboarding?" Hux asks him as he grabs both of them. 

"Yeah, I've just always been better at it," they get on the ski lift and he almost forgot how breathtaking the scenery is here. Hux seems to be appreciating it too and his mood lifting. They get to the top of the mountain and he finds a spot that's pretty empty of other people. 

"Alright you can sit down on that bench and ill help you get your skis on."   
 

"I don't need help Kylo." 

Kylo makes a small nod of his head towards his family that's now joined them up at the top and Hux relents. He sits on the bench and Kylo goes down to one knee to clip him in, "you've never done this before anyways and we need to make sure you're secure. Do you really want one of your skis coming off halfway down?" 

"You have a point I suppose." 

"Once I get you standing you can walk around in them a little to get used to them and gain your balance." 

"Alright," Kylo doesn't say anything else as he concentrates on securely clipping Hux into his boots.  

He looks up to Hux when he feels him staring, "are you okay?"  

Hux looks nervous, "yes just watching how you do it".  

"Alright you're all clipped in," he puts out his hands to help Hux stand. Hux takes them and gingerly starts to stand wobbling only for a second before standing straight.  

"It's not too bad I guess." 

"Okay, so here are your poles they help stabilize you, try taking a few steps forward," he's doing good until on one step he accidently crosses the skis and nearly falls but Kylo is there. He grabs hold onto his arm and reassures him that he'll get the hang of it.  

There are several different slopes they can take and Kylo moves them to one that's a little more secluded. This slope isn't as steep and shouldn't be too hard so Hux can practice. He clips himself in while Hux seems to be testing the security of his boots.  

"You ready?"  

"As ready as I'll ever be."  

"Oh one more thing," he reaches into his coat and pulls out goggles for both of them. He slips on Hux's for him and then puts his own on.   

"Are these really necessary? I can't even see your eyes through yours, now I won't be able to tell when you're rolling your eyes at me." 

"What a shame and they're all like that, they block out the light reflected back from the snow," he moves to stand behind Hux and rests his hands on his to guide him through the motions, he tries to ignore how stiff Hux gets at the contact, "alright so just be sure to keep your skis straight, you want to bend slightly at the knee and use your weight to shift from side to side. Use your poles to push off and to go faster, easy enough?" Hux simply nods his head. 

"I have faith in you Hux, you've got this," he gets closer to the edge of the slope. 

"Your faith in me is all I need," there's no real bitterness in his tone. 

"That's the spirit," is all he says before pushing himself off down the hill. He may or not be showing off as he glides from side to side as he goes down. He reaches the bottom and Hux is still hasn't move from his spot at the top, "come on Hux!"  

He can hear him mumble something as he pushes himself off, he's visibly unsteady as he starts making his way down. He's doing really good and as Hux is almost to the bottom he realizes he didn't tell him how to stop. As he gets closer Kylo braces himself and throws his arm out to catch Hux around his waist and turns him around to stop.  

Hux stumbles a little and lifts his goggles to make sure Kylo knows he's not happy, "sorry about that, so to stop you need turn the skis sideways and push into the snow". 

"Yes, that might have been helpful to mention earlier," Hux bites out while trying to catch his breath having probably realized that half way down.  

"I said I was sorry,are you ready to go again?"  

"Can't wait," Hux says the sarcasm evident in his voice as he puts his goggles back on. 

They go up the ski lifts and down the slopes a few times. Hux won't admit it but he can tell he's starting to have fun. They watch Rey and Finn race down the slopes a few times, Rey coming out victorious. He helps BB learn how to snowboard watches on with Hux as his dad relearns how to ski. 

Everything's going great, having Hux around calms him and he doesn't find himself getting frustrated by his family like so often in the past. He never thought he would get to spend so much alone time with Hux. He has to keep reminding himself that it isn't permanent, that they'll both go back to their regular lives after this.  

He's at the top of the slopes and turns to ask Hux if he's ready to go back home. Before he can say anything Hux is going down again, except down the longer slope, he must be feeling more confident. Kylo watches him go down and he's doing well, but then Hux hits an uneven patch of snow. Hux starts wobbling and he can't do anything as he watches Hux lose control and fall, sliding down the slope towards where the tree line is. 

"Hux!"  

He goes down the slope to try to catch up with Hux. There's nothing he can do as Hux slides into the tree line, he sees Hux wrap his arms around his head but he still visibly hits it on one of the pines. He makes it down the slope as fast as he can and unfastens his snowboard as soon as he gets to Hux. Hux is laying against the tree and not moving, he feels like he might be sick. He lays Hux so that he's on his back, removes both their goggles and puts his hands on either side of his face, "Hux, Hux! can you hear me?"  

Hux starts to stir and weakly tries to slap his hands away, "what do you want?" he mumbles and cracks his eyes open for a moment before closing them again.   

"Hux don't close your eyes, look at me," he's trying not to panic. 

"Mmmmm, what's wrong?"  

"You..you fell and hit your head, do you know where you are?"  

He looks around, "hell and it's frozen over."  

"Close enough, can you sit up?" Ren helps him steady himself with a hand on his lower back.  

"Shit," Hux winces in visible pain  

"What hurts?"  

"Besides my dignity, my head and I am pretty sure I rolled my ankle. I told you I didn't want to do this," he growls out the last part.  

"Come on we need to get down to the lodge at the base of the mountain and see the medic there," he unclips the skis from Hux's feet as gently as he can.  

"Ben! what happened?" his mom must have seen the whole thing and is rushing over.  

"He's okay mom, just a little fall."  

"Little fall my ass," Hux grumbles at him to where only he can hear him.  

"You kids need help?" his dad has made his way over too.  

"No, I'm fine really I can walk on my own," Kylo helps him to stand and he notices Hux not putting any weight on his right ankle while he gathers his bearings. When he tries to put weight on his leg and take a step forward he turns his head to muffle a curse into his shoulder. This probably couldn't be any more embarrassing for Hux with Kylo's parents watching, "I just need a minute, please don't worry about me," he tries waving them away. 

"Mom, can I get the keys to the car? I'm going to take him to see the medic and then head back home."  

"Of course, do you need our help?" she looks worried but he knows Hux doesn't want help.  

"No, I'll be fine, really don't worry."  

"You're sure?" his dad asks.  

"Yes, Sir."  

"Alright, please make sure to go see the medic before you leave. We won't be far behind you," she hands him the keys. 

"Okay, thank you both," they both watch his parents go back to the ski lift, probably to tell everyone what happened. They probably could have used their help, but Hux is always too proud to accept help from people. 

Kylo turns to Hux who has a miserable look on his face, "Hux you're not going to be able to walk out of here, you'll need to let me carry you," it's the only way he's going to unpainfully make it to the lodge.  

"Hell no, Kylo you are not carrying me off this mountain," he growls under his breath.  

"What am I supposed to do then Hux?"  

"Just leave me here to die a slow, cold death."  

"Alright, now I'm sure you've hit your head, come on," before Hux can say anything in protest Kylo wraps an arm around his shoulders and under his knees lifting him off the snow. He knows Hux is thin but he weighs a lot less than he thought he would. 

Hux scrambles a little bit as he holds on, wrapping an arm around his neck, "if Phasma or anyone else at the office finds out about this no one will be able to find your body," he says under his breath.    
 

"What, that I had to carry you off the mountain like a damsel in distress, I would never," he says with the biggest grin.  

Hux's face goes red, "I hate you".  

"If that makes you feel better," he readjusts Hux in his arms to make sure his hold is steady.  

The sudden shift must jostle an injury, "damnit Kylo," he thinks he means for it to come out sharp but instead it sounds more like a whimper.  

"I'm sorry," Kylo grips him a little tighter and Hux ends up resting his head on his shoulder. Hux doesn't say much as they make their way and when he looks down he realizes Hux has closed his eyes and a dark bruise is forming on his hairline. 

"Hey don't go to sleep," Kylo shifts him around in his arms a little and Hux opens his eyes most likely not even realizing he had closed them.  

"Mmmm," is all the protest he gets.  

"Come on Hux stay awake until we see the medic."  

"Okay, okay," Hux buries his face into Kylo's scarf and he gasps at the cold contact against his neck, "I'm so cold".  

"I know, I'll get you warmed up soon we're almost there."  

They see the medic on shift and Hux doesn't say much as he's looked over. The medic verifies that Hux only rolled his ankle and that it's luckily not sprained. He'll also have a bad headache for the rest of the night but he didn't receive a concussion. It's good news and he breathes a sigh of relief, the last thing he wanted was for Hux to get injured. The medic also lets them know that it's normal for Hux to feel tired and that it's safe to sleep. Which Hux does the whole ride home, and immediately when they get back up to the room.   

He leaves Hux to get some sleep and makes his way down to the living room where everywhere else is gathered. He can't believe he let this happen, he's not really focusing on any of the conversations when is mom comes to sit next to him. 

"Ben are you okay?" 

"Yeah mom, I'm fine," he forces a smile for her. 

She rests a hand on his knee, he didn't realize he'd been bouncing his leg, "it's not your fault sweetie, he'll be fine okay?" 

"I know. I'm going to go wake him up soon, can you make some food for me to bring up?" 

"Of course." 

It's been a couple of hours so he decides it's time to wake Hux up, he's still worried regardless of what the medic said. His mother gives him some alieve and makes some food for Hux and he brings it up to the room. 

He gently shakes Hux's shoulder trying to rouse him, "hey Hux, you need to wake up".  

Hux groans before mumbling, "don't want to, go away".  

"Come on, I  brought some food and some headache medicine," Hux sighs before slowly sitting up in bed  and Kylo hands him the food, "you know where you are?"  

"Still in hell, although not as frozen over."  

"Okay good, the medic said you might feel a little confused when you woke up. Though it looks like you're not having any problems with that. They also said to try and keep your ankle elevated and that we should put some ice on it if it starts swelling," Hux isn't really looking at him while he talks and doesn't seem like he's really focusing. He leans down a little, "Hux are you listening to m-" suddenly Hux places a finger on his lips.  

"You're too loud," for a few seconds they simply stare at one another while Hux keeps his finger there. Hux then starts to slightly rub his finger against his bottom lip. They've never had this kind of contact before and he knows Hux isn't in a solid state of mind. He should pull back but he feels the need to press his lips into the contact. He wants to lightly kiss the bruise on Hux's head and tell him he's sorry any of this happened. 

Before he can do anything Hux seems to finally realize what he's doing and snaps his hand back, "sorry, like you said confused...I'm going to go take a bath," he puts the food aside and swings his legs over the bed and tries to stand. What happens instead is that he falls forward and Kylo quickly has to catch him before he falls. 

"Hux you need to rest you don't have a concussion but it's close enough."  

Hux winces, all the pain must be coming back to him and he relents to sit back down on the bed. He quietly takes the pills and drinks down a glass of water. Hux looks at his plate of food before looking up at him.  

"Did you make this?"  

"What does it matter?"  

"I've been to your apartment Kylo, your fridge is covered in takeout menus and I'm worried about food poisoning on top of everything else."  

He sighs and rolls his eyes, he's aware he's not a good cook, "good to see your sense of humor didn't take any damage in the fall. My mom made the food, you're safe".  

It's all the reassurance seems to need before finishing the plate off.  

"Are you feeling better?" 

"Yes thank you." 

"I'm sorry about what happened," 

"It's not your fault, I shouldn't have gotten over confident," 

"Still I-" Hux interrupts him. 

"Kylo, you're forgiven, as long as no one at the office ever finds out, do you hear me?" 

"Yes, I wouldn't want to wound your pride as well." 

"Thank you, now I'm going back to sleep," Hux lays back down under the blankets but stays facing him 

"Me too," he hesitates before getting into the bed, "do I need to take the couch?" 

"You're fine," Hux is already drifting off again, "just try to keep the talking down to a minimum". 

He feels his face heat up, he had forgotten he'd woken Hux up last night. It's something he hates that he does and has no control over. He's always been afraid he might say something weird and avoids even sleeping in the same room as friends because of it.  

"I'll try my best," as if he has any say in the matter, he slides into bed, "I promise tomorrow we won't leave the lodge, mom always has a tradition of a Christmas movie marathon". 

"Good," Hux lets out a yawn, "goodnight Kylo". 

"Goodnight Hux." 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentines Day everyone!! 
> 
> Hope you got to spend time with people you care about and feel all the love! <3 <3 <3

When Hux wakes up, he does not feel well rested at all. He feels more like he's been run over by a snowplow and he can't hold back a groan as he rolls over. He feels cradled though and wrapping the blankets tighter around his shoulders he snuggles in, it's so warm and comfortable. He burrows in more to chase the warmth and the scent of familiar cologne...familiar...but not his cologne... 

His eyes snap open and he's met with a wall of chest under a blank tank top rising and falling slowly. Kylo's arm is around him and there's really no way of escape from his position without waking Kylo up. He doesn't know what to do, it's not as if it's exactly an uncomfortable spot to be in. How many times as he imagined what this would be like, to feel protected and safe. He could just go back to sleep pretend he didn't realize what was going on. It might be embarrassing when they wake up but it would probably be less so than being caught trying to get out of his grip. 

He's almost drifted off again when he hears Kylo start making noise...shit Kylo's awake and now things will be awkward and...he glances up. Kylo's eyes are still closed, he's talking in his sleep again. Maybe if he just slowly and tentatively moves away he won't wake him up...Kylo gets louder.  

The noises Kylo is making start to sound too similar to moaning, he feels heat rush to his face, he needs to get away before his body does something stupid. He pushes off the bed and is standing faster than he ever thought possible, unsteady at first but he recovers quickly. Kylo jolts awake and sits up on the bed, his hair a mess and brain still obviously fuzzy with sleep. 

"What's going on?" 

"Nothing didn't mean to wake you up, just um, I'm going to go take a shower. Didn't get to take one last night." 

"Mmmm alright, how are you feeling today?"  

"Sore but good." 

"Good," Kylo says as he gives him a sleepy smile, "what time is it?" 

"Just after eight." 

Kylo flops back down onto the bed, "okay, wake me up when you get out, then we can go down and get some food." 

"Alright," he takes his bag into the bathroom and leans against the door for a moment after closing it. That could have turned out a lot worse, just a couple of more days and they'll be back at work. Things will be back to normal and he can get some distance from all of this. He starts a hot bath, hoping that soaking for a little awhile will help with the slight soreness all over. 

He's only in a few of minutes before there's knocking on the door, "Hux are you okay?" 

"Yes, I'm fine, why?" 

"You've been in there for almost an hour." 

Oh, the water does feel noticeably cooler now that he thinks about it, he doesn't remember falling asleep, "I'll be out in a minute," he won't worry about it, he was cleared by the medic and he remembers being told he would feel tired for a while.

When he gets out of the bath he's feeling better than he would have hoped for having fallen down the side of a mountain. When he checks in the mirror the bruise on his head isn't too bad or noticeable, he'll just let his hair fall down today. That's what he gets for being over confident, and he's pretty sure half of Kylo's family saw it all happen, or at least they all know all the details of what happened by now. 

Kylo looks worried as he enters the room, "hey, I got some headache medicine from my mom, in case your head still hurts". 

"Thank you," he takes the bottle from Kylo and decides to take two pills before handing it back to him. 

"You sure you're okay?" 

"Really I'm fine, you don't need to babysit me. Were you worried about me?" he says it in a joking tone but Kylo doesn't seem comforted by it.

"Of course I was, why wouldn't I be," Kylo runs a quick hand through his hair before moving closer to the door, "I shouldn't have made you go up there". 

"Kylo stop, if I really didn't want to go skiing I wouldn't have gone. You didn't make me do anything I wasn't willing to do in the first place," he doesn't understand why Kylo is beating himself up about what happened, it's his fault. Though he knows if the roles were reserved he would definitely be worried about Kylo.  

"Now let us get downstairs and get this horrible Christmas movie marathon over with." 

"It's not as bad as it sounds," he levels Kylo with a look, "okay, it's pretty bad," that gets Kylo to laugh and makes him feel better. 

He's relieved when Leia is the only one to bring up what happened yesterday. She immediately noticed the bruise he was trying to hide and mothered over him until he was finally able to assure her that he was fine. She still made him take extra french toast as if the sweets would somehow cure him of his ailments. He couldn't help but feel the love from the sentiment, his grandmother often stopped his crying as a child the same way. 

The movie marathon starts with Miracle on 34th Street, and then Home Alone and then numerous stop motion Christmas stories. All in all, it's not as torturous as he thought it would be, it's actually nice to be surrounded by people all just enjoying each other's company. The coach is comfortable and Kylo sits in the middle between him and his mother. They're halfway through Rudolph when he feels his eyelids growing heavy. No one would notice if he just closes his eyes for a moment. 

"..ux, Hux?" 

"Wha?" he shakes his head a little to get over the tiredness. 

"You know you can go up to the room if you're tired," Kylo whispers to him. 

"I'm not tired." 

"Well maybe not now, you just slept for like an hour," Finn says from the other couch next to him. 

"What?" 

"Yeah, it was pretty adorable," Rey chimes in, "oh, Ben I think you might have some drool on your shoulder". 

He looks to Kylo's shoulder and there is an obvious dark stain on his shirt. He feels embarrassed, he just fell asleep and apparently used Kylo's shoulder as a pillow and proceeded to drool on him. Obviously, Kylo didn't mind otherwise he would have woken up, "leave him alone Rey". 

He takes in the room and notices they're the only ones in it, "where is everybody else?" 

"The "grownups" are all in the kitchen getting alcohol before the next movie," Rey air quotes as she says it. 

Hux gets up from the couch, "I need one too," any excuse to get away from the snickering teenagers. 

Kylo's up and following right behind him, "are you sure that's a good idea?" 

"I told you I'm fine." 

Han makes him a nice whiskey and coke and they all make their way back into the living room. They all decide they've had enough of movies and instead start playing Christmas games. They play charades and a few other games before playing spoons. Except instead of spoons they use candy canes and those end up being dangerous weapons once they're broken.  

He's actually having a great time, he doesn't remember that last time he was able to relax like this. The few drinks he's had don't hurt either, they tend to make him a little touchy which is good for the situation. He feels like he's playing the part of boyfriend pretty well for Kylo. A kiss on the cheek here, unsubtle hand holding there, maybe teasing Kylo a little more than he should. He lets go of his reservations and pretends for a little while that this isn't fake, that it could be real. They're about to start round four of spoons when he notices that Kylo's gotten rather quiet.  

He gets up to get another drink before the next round, "everything alright Kylo?" 

"Yeah, I'll go with you," he seems a little serious. 

"Alright." 

Kylo follows him into the kitchen and guides him over to one side of the kitchen island. The look on his face makes him think he's about to be scolded, "Hux don't you think you should slow it down a little bit?" 

"What? I'm just having fun." 

"It's just that I think you're pushing yourself too hard after what happened yesterday," Kylo lowers his voice a little, "you're also being really touchy". 

"Kylo you already know what I'm like after a couple of drinks, it's not anything new. Second isn't this why you brought me here, isn't this what you wanted," he feels himself getting angry and he doesn't really understand why he wants to get so defensive. He was just stupid to think that he could let his defenses down and hope that maybe his feelings would be returned. He feels like a kid again, getting reprimanded for not just sitting still and being quiet like a good boy should. 

"It's not like that...I just.."

"Just what?"

"Hux calm down." 

"Don't tell me what to do," he growls back, things were going so well, why are they even having this argument. 

"Hey, you guys!" 

"What!?," he yells out to whoever has the nerve to interrupt. 

He sees Finn point up, both he and Kylo look up to see mistletoe above them and now half the people in the other room are looking at them. He can't handle this right now, "Kylo can kiss my ass," he moves to turn but Kylo grabs his arm. He's about to lose it and turns to Kylo to lash out at him. He opens his mouth to say something, instead, he's silenced by Kylo's lips on his.  

It's a firm kiss, but his lips are still as soft as he imagined they would be. The kiss turns gentle and then almost desperate as their lips move across each other. He feels his body start to heat up, and he gets lost in the sensation for a moment but is soon snapped out of it by someone in the room clearing their throat. He comes back to himself and pulls back abruptly jerking his arm away and glares at Kylo who seems unfazed. It was their first kiss, and it didn't even mean anything, just a little show for his family and he feels so hurt. They had agreed on not doing this one thing, he shoves Kylo away from him and this time he's able to walk away without someone grabbing him. He makes it back to the room and locks the door behind him before making himself a hot bath. 

He doesn't fall asleep this time, too worked up by his emotions. He can't decide if he's angry, embarrassed, or just hurt, he refuses to cry regardless. This whole charade was a bad idea and he should never have agreed to it. Now he's made yet another spectacle of himself in front of Kylo's family. Once his skin starts to wrinkle he gets out, dries himself off and gets into bed. He takes more than just his half of the bed and figures Kylo can go find another room to sleep in.  

He's almost unconscious when he hears the door knob click, of course, it's his family's lodge, of course, they would have a key. He stills himself and pretends to be asleep, he's not ready to have this conversation. He's still angry and a little drunk and doesn't want to say anything he'll regret. 

The door is shut almost soundlessly, "Hux?" Kylo says in only a whisper and Hux makes no hint that he's still awake, he hears a sigh from Kylo before he says, "I can tell you're awake". 

Hux grits his teeth, "then you should know that means I don't want to talk to you right now". 

"I wanted to apologize, I know we agreed not to do that, I shouldn't have done that." 

"Yes, I'm still aware this is all just a big show for your family don't feel the need to remind me," he bites his lip from saying anything else, that's exactly the kind of thing he didn't want to say. 

"Why are you saying it like that?" 

"Just leave me alone, I want to go to sleep," he pulls the covers over his head and Kyllo must get the hint because he doesn't hear another word from him. He hears the rustle of movement as Kylo takes the couch. Now he feels petty and guilty, mad that Kylo is making him feel this way and has to fight back the urge to cry again. He's not weak he won't do it, not over something as insignificant as hurt feelings. 

 

 

=== 

   
 

   
After last night he's sure Hux won't talk to him for the rest of the holiday. He honestly hadn't meant to make him so upset last night, he doesn't really know how things escalated the way they did. He had just been worried about Hux and blamed himself for his injuries. Then Hux gets touchy when he drinks and it had just felt too real and didn't know how much more of Hux touching him he could handle. Then the stupid mistletoe and his impulsiveness had gotten the better of him. He went and did the worst thing he could have done in the moment and forced Hux to do something he didn't want to do. For a moment while they were kissing it seemed real, that Hux had wanted it just as much as he had. Then Hux pulled away and had given him a look of betrayal, he felt like he would be sick. As Hux walked away from him he could only stand there for a moment before finally being able to move. He needed air, any excuse to get away from everyone else. 

The kids had lit a fire pit, so he had sat outside for about an hour just staring into the fire. Kicking himself for his stupidity, he was going to ruin this. He felt like any chance of telling Hux his true feelings was now gone. He had collected himself for a moment before going back inside and given his mom a small reassuring smile before going up to the room. When he had tried to turn the handle it had been locked. He was then sure that he had officially ruined what small chance he may have had. 

It was like a walk of shame to go back downstairs to his mother and ask her for a key to the room. She was actually understanding and gave him a small pat on his hand as she handed him the key. When he had entered the room Hux didn't even seem to be breathing. He had immediately known that meant Hux was pretending to be asleep which hurt more than he thought it would. He apologized as much as Hux would let him before deciding the couch was probably the best route to go. 

He had hoped that this trip would help him finally gather the courage to tell Hux how he felt. Whether Hux returned his feelings or not he would accept the outcome. He didn't know how much longer he could just pretend to not have deeper feelings than friendship towards him. Now he just hopes he can salvage this trip and Hux not hate him when they get back. 

In the morning Hux was up before him and out of the room by the time he got up. It's Christmas Eve so he knows his mom is busy making a huge breakfast. He changes into new clothes before cautiously making his way back down. He can hear his mother in the kitchen and before he turns the corner from the stairs he hears Hux's voice as well and stops short of the last step. 

"Hux?" 

"Yes, ma'am?" 

"Don't be too mad at Ben, he can be impulsive sometimes, I know he didn't mean to make you feel embarrassed." 

"I suppose," he can tell from Hux's tone that he's still mad. 

"I know he cares about you a lot, it was almost as soon as he started working at the company with you that your name was all I heard." 

"What do you mean?" 

His mother makes a small laugh, "well at first all he would do was complain. That you were bossy, that you didn't trust him with certain projects and he felt like you thought he wasn't good enough. But I guess he realized that you just didn't want him to fail because of something you had designed". 

"Is that so." 

"Then all I heard about was how smart you were, handsome, and how someone like you would never be inter-" he takes the last couple of steps loudly, he needs to end this line of conversation right now... 

"Good morning," he says as he walks into the kitchen. 

"Ben! Good morning did you sleep well?" 

He tries to make eye contact with Hux but the other man turns around to put things away into the sink, "I did," he gives her a kiss on the forehead before moving closer to Hux cautiously to stand next to him, "can I help?" 

"Sure," Hux throws a towel at him without really acknowledging him and he starts drying the dishes Hux hands to him. 

"It smells really good mom." 

"Good to hear, Hux here helped me out a lot by making some of it." 

"Compliments aren't needed Leia, bacon, and eggs are a simple enough thing to do." 

"Yes, but it gave me time to make the pancakes and cinnamon rolls, besides I wouldn't trust Ben with that task," he can hear the humor in her tone. 

"Mom, I can-" before he can finish his mom cuts him off. 

"Ben honey, please I know you live off of takeout and frozen meals." 

Hux snorts next to him and he can see the beginning of a smile and he feels so relieved. He'll gladly be the butt of the joke if it'll get him back into Hux's good graces, "yeah well, it's just easier alright". 

"Just because it's easier doesn't mean it's better. Well, everything's ready, can you boys set the table while I go tell everyone the foods ready?" 

"We got it, mom." 

Hux dries off his hands before reaching into the cupboards for plates, Kylo goes to get the silverware. Hux is placing the plates very precisely in front of each chair while he goes behind him putting down the forks and knives. They haven't said anything to each other and the silence is starting to get to him. 

"I want to apologize again for last night." 

"There's no need to apologize." 

"But I want to anyways, I shouldn't have done that." 

"It was just a kiss Kylo I'll get over it," that's not how he wants Hux to feel. 

"I'm not apologizing for the kiss," he pauses until Hux finally looks up to him, "I'm sorry about the way I did it and not thinking about how it would make you feel but I don't regret it," maybe there's still a chance he can save this. 

Hux looks away again, "oh, well, Kylo I-". 

Hux is cut off by people starting to come into the dining room. Neither one of them really say much during breakfast and the rest of the day is the same way. He doesn't feel any tension in the silence and he feels like Hux must know that he was genuine in his apology. Thankfully no one mentions anything about what happened last night and after more family time they both head back up to the room. He can tell Hux has had something on his mind, he has the same look he does when he's trying to figure something out at work. He won't push it though, if Hux wants to say something he'll let him say it when he's ready.

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the long wait on this chapter, but I hope you enjoy reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it :)

The two of them make it back up to the room in silence, continuing on like how most of the day went. They shuffle into the room Kylo making his way to the small kitchen and he decides to lay on the couch, his headache returning with full force. 

After what happened last night there was a lingering tension in the air, not uncomfortable per se but more confusing. Leia's words keep replaying over in his head and then what Kylo said before breakfast. Maybe the kiss was more than just a show for his family, he knows well enough that Kylo doesn't always think things through. What does that mean then, where does that leave them? 

He closes his eyes as he leans his back against the arm rest, "this isn't how I expected this week to go," he means his feelings for Kylo growing, he should have seen this coming. He just feels like sleeping here tonight, he rubs his temples with his fingers trying to relieve the tension. 

He startles when a hand grazes his forehead, he didn't even hear Kylo walking over, "I'm sorry about everything that's happened this week," he opens his eyes and looks up to Kylo. 

"I..it's fine, really, things happen." 

"Okay, still I know this isn't the vacation you were hoping it would be," Kylo sighs, "let me get you some medicine and then I'll take a quick shower," Kylo turns to leave and his first instinct is to grab his wrist. His skin is hot and he looks so young in this lighting. He wants to ask, 'do you really have feelings for me Kylo?' instead, "don't use all the hot water, I want to get in after you," and he releases his hold. 

Kylo looks like he wants to ask something too but just clenches his jaw and answers, "right," before walking away. 

While Kylo takes a shower he tries to think of what to say, things can't just stay like this. He would rather get things get straightened out here before they have to go back to working together. By the time he gets out of the shower himself he's no closer to knowing what to say. 

When he steps out of the bathroom Kylo is already asleep, he takes in his face so laxed and peaceful. He can't even pretend to himself that he's ready to sleep yet so he dresses light and makes his way down to the lounge. A large round table is surrounded by plush chairs and sit in front of a huge fireplace. He takes a seat and for a little while he just sits and stares into the fire, watching the flames flicker high and low. He brings out his phone and decides to text Phasma for a bit asking how things are going. She assures him that things aren't falling apart without them for now but demands souvenirs. She gets easilly frustrated with Mitaka and the rest and he laughs to himself at her ranting.  

"What's so funny?" he jumps a little at the sudden voice. Poe makes a small laugh and takes a seat next to him, "didn't mean to startle you". 

"It's fine, and it's just something from work." 

"Must be nice to have a job where you can joke around," the conversation stops there while Hux wishes the guy would just leave him in peace. 

"So, what are you doing down here alone? You and Ben have a fight again or something?" 

"No, Kylo's sleeping," he understands Kylo's mom not using the name he prefers but he can tell Poe is doing it out of spite, "I'm not tired yet and didn't want to bother him". 

"Understandable he can have quite the temper sometimes." 

"Not that I've seen," frustrated often maybe, but it's never bothered him. 

"It doesn't really seem like the two of you belong together," he feels a twinge of jealously. He doesn't care at this point if Poe and Kylo have a history. He's been playing the part perfectly for Kylo's sake and he's not about to let Poe jeopardize this facade. 

"I don't know where you're leading with that, but if you think you can come between the two of us to get back with Kylo you're wasting your time," he looks toward Poe as he says it trying not to raise his voice. 

Poe first looks puzzled and then smirks at him, "you've got it backward," he slightly leans a little closer, "I'm trying to say you're too good for him." 

"Pardon?" 

"Why are with someone like Ben? You're handsome, smart and witty too." 

"What is that even supposed to mean?" he starts to feel his pulse spike. 

"You've been with him long enough to see it right. He still acts like a kid, going around calling himself Kylo Ren. He's still over emotional and throws temper tantrums when he doesn't get his way. You deserve someone better, more mature-" 

Hux slams his fist down on the table in front of him, startling Poe, and lowers his voice to a growl, "you will not talk about Kylo like that. He's extremely intelligent and works harder than most people I know. He may wear his heart on his sleeve but that doesn't make him a child. He cares deeply about those he's close to and it's a shame you never realized what an amazing thing you had when you had it," he moves to stand and sneer down at Poe, "If you have any sense you'll stay away from him and myself as well is that understood?" 

"Hux?" 

He whips his head around to see Kylo standing behind him, shit, how much did he hear? Enough if the slight blush and nervous hand movements are anything to go by.  

"Come on Kylo, we're going back to the room," he takes ahold of Kylo's hand and starts dragging him back to their room before he can protest. He glances back behind him as they walk up the stairs to see Kylo looking down with a stupid smile on his face. When they get back into the room he lets go of his hand and they stand awkwardly for a moment before Kylo shuffles to the kitchen and Hux flops onto the bed. When Kylo comes back out of the kitchen he sits on the edge of the bed on his phone, glancing at him every now and then. 

Kylo finally breaks the silence, "Wha-what you said down there, did you mean it?" 

"I did," he says quietly. 

"No ones ever said something like that about me. Most people would have just agreed with Poe." 

"Well, I'm not most people." 

"No, you're not," there's that stupid smile again, "thank you," Kylo says as he stands up, "do you want some tea or something?" he turns to go to the small kitchen and Hux stands and again takes ahold of Kylo's wrist. 

"Kylo I...nevermind," when he pulls his hand away this time though Kylo takes his hand.  

"No, what is it?," Kylo's eyes are earnest as he looks at him and Hux has to look away. 

They're at the cusp of something, what ever he says now can't be taken back nor can it be changed. Where does he start? What if what he feels for Kylo isn't fully returned? He'll be stuck here until the end of the week and then when they go back to work it won't be the same. He can't, things need to stay the way they are he just- 

"Hux?" he doesn't realize he's shaking until Kylo rubs thumb across his wrist. 

"It's nothing, I'm just tired, tea sounds good, though," he puts on his best fake smile and just hopes Kylo will let it go. 

Kylo takes a deep breath and then in a jumble, "Hux do you like me?" 

"What?" 

Another rush of words come out of Kylo's mouth, "I've had real feelings for you for awhile now and I thought maybe somehow you felt the same, but maybe I was just imagining the whole thing and I just never knew how to bring it up, I didn't want to ruin the friendship we have if it wasn't the case, I'm sorry, this is embarrassing-" 

He squeezes Kylo's hand to get his attention, "Kylo shut up," for a moment Kylo looks hurt so he quickly gathers the courage to tell him, "I do have feelings for you, you idiot". 

"Really?" he asks Hux as if it's the most unbelievable thing he's heard. Hux can only nod his head yes, Kylo full on smiles and he feels like he would do anything to keep it there. He catches Kylo looking down to his lips before looking him in the eyes again. The hand that Kylo isn't holding, he gently places against his chest. Their eyes are focused on one another, there's no one else here, no one to put on a show for, it's only them.  

He leans slightly forward and Kylo meets him halfway and yes this is what it's supposed to feel like, he melts into it. Kylo's hand slides around his neck and pulls him closer and Hux cups Kylo's cheeks in his. The kisses are soft, their mouths move slowly against each other. It's electric and soon turns earnest as if to make up for all the times they haven't been doing it. 

They break apart to catch their breaths and Hux pushes Kylo to have his back against the wall pinning him there. Kylo's eyes are glazed over now, his lips parted and he takes them again wet opened mouth kisses. Kylo breaks away again to put kisses on his cheek, his jaw and then his neck. He can't filter the noises coming out of his mouth as Kylo licks and nips at his neck. 

"Hux, can I touch you?" 

"Yes, yes please," Kylo's hand slides across his chest and down his side before starting to undo the buttons on his shirt. He scrambles to do the same, pulling Kylo's shirt off. It's the first time he's seen him completely shirtless. 

"Gods Kylo, you were hiding all this under there," he runs a soft hand down his muscled chest and stomach and it tenses under his touch. 

"It's okay?" Kylo says looking worried for no reason. 

"I like everything about you Kylo, even the things I don't know yet, I know I will," Kylo's face goes completely red before ducking his head, his hair hiding his face now, "did I embarrass you Kylo?" he keeps his tone playful before rubbing a thumb across one of Kylo's nipples causing him to gasp out. 

He looks back up to him, "you're mean", he says with no real irritation behind it. 

"You already knew that," he smirks. 

Kylo quickly dips down again and sharply nips at the side of his neck and he knows that will leave a mark, "you little shit," he gasps out. 

"You already knew that," he mocks back in a fake accent.  

Hux moves to grip Kylo through his pajamas and that silences him. He's relieved but not too surprised to feel Kylo is already hard. Kylo moves his face into Hux's neck again but this time lets out the nicest moan into it. 

"It's been awhile, hasn't it Kylo?" he whispers into his ear and that earns him a shiver. 

"Yes." 

"We won't rush things, but I want to make you feel good, will you let me?" 

"Mmmm Hux please." 

He presses his body harder against Kylo and slides his leg in between his. Kylo looks completely debauched, lust and trust clear in his eyes. To see either look in Kylo's eyes, he never thought this would happen, "how long have you had feelings for me Kylo?" he whispers in Kylo's ear as he starts to put pressure on Kylo with his thigh. 

"M-months, that night at the pub when I saw you smile for the first time." 

It's his turn to be embarrassed and hides his face against Kylo's neck, "do you know how cheesy that sounds?" 

"What about you then?" 

He thinks about it for a moment and it clicks, "around the same time," when Kylo had said he liked his smile, "I guess we're both not good with expressing our feelings it would seem". 

"Hux," Kylo says his name as a whimper and gods if that isn't the best sound he's ever heard. 

"Shhh i've got you," he moves his hands down to grip Kylo through his pants and Kylo grinds into the contact. He unties Kylo's pants and slowly pulls them down, sliding his hand into Kylo's boxers to grip him, he's so warm and full in his hand. Kylo groans as a he lightly squeezes and starts to stroke him, he's getting louder and they should probably move this away from next to the door. He slides Kylo's pants down and he gets the hint to step out of them. 

When he removes his hand Kylo makes a small noise so he kisses him before walking backwards to lead them towards the bed. He turns them around guiding Kylo to lay down onto it. He's now splayed out on the bed in front of him flushed and breathing heavy. He never thought he would get to see Kylo this way, to know that he's the reason behind his arousal. Feeling emboldened he stands in front of Kylo making a show of undoing the buttons of his pants, stroking himself through them before slowing unzipping. Kylo is staring down at his hands in awe so he hopes he doesn't see the small smile that's now on his face. After removing his pants he slides onto the bed straddling Kylo's hips both of them obviously straining against their boxers. 

He guides Kylo again to sit resting against the headboard, still straddling his hips he puts his lips against him in another kiss. He notices Kylo move his hands up a little only to clench them and drop them back to the bed, "you can touch me," he whispers against Kylo's lips, "in fact I really want you to". 

Kylo visibly swallows, "I just, never thought I'd ever be able to," he looks up to him before tentatively putting his hands on his hips. Moving his hands lower he grips Hux's ass, lifting him up slightly, spreading his cheeks and pulling him closer to one another in the process. 

"That's it, just like that," he hasn't been touched by another person in so long, "that feels so good Kylo". 

The praise only seems to boost Kylo's confidence as he grips him tighter in his hands. Soon enough those hands are sliding under the band of his boxers and gripping him directly before pulling them down to expose his now leaking cock, "beautiful," Kylo whispers against his ear and he can't help but shiver as he continues to trail his lips down his neck. 

He can't remember the last time he was this turned on, he's getting impatient, "underwear needs to come off," Kylo can take it for the command it sounds like. 

They shuffle around and finally, it's all skin on skin, he wraps his hand around the back of Kylo's head and kisses him deeply. He takes them both in hand and squeezes both moaning at the sensation. Kylo throws his head back and if not for his hand there would have slammed against the headboard. He starts stroking both of them, slowly at first and then increases the pressure and speed. 

Kylo sucks marks onto his chest and collarbone as he continues to stroke them. Kylo's tongue licks across one of nipples and he has to stifle a loud noise, only encouraging him to keep licking. They're both thrusting up into his hand and he doesn't think he'll last much longer. 

"Look at me Kylo," his eyes are unfocused but he can tell he's doing his best to look at him, "are you close". 

"Yes," he squeezes Hux's hips and thrusts hard into one of the strokes as if to prove it. 

"Me too, put your hand on mine," the added pressure of his hand around his is perfect. They kiss again desperate and seeking. Soon they're both coming into eachothers hands gasping into eachothers mouths. When they both take their hands away, before Hux can say anything, Kylo wraps his arms around him and pulls him in tight 

"I've wanted you this close for so long." 

"Me too Kylo," he hugs him back and they sit there for a few moments, "we should rinse off". 

"In a minute, I don't want to let go yet," he's glad that Kylo can't see the rising blush that's coming back to his face. 

"You know you can still hold me in the shower, I'm not going anywhere Kylo". 

Kylo makes a hum of agreement and loosens his grip a little. Hux shifts to sit on the side of the bed ready to stand but is stopped by Kylo's arms again. In the next moment, Kylo is lifting him up into his arms to carry him. He should be mad, and he won't admit it, but he actually likes this little show of strength. 

He wraps his arms around Kylo's neck, "you're an imbecile," he says but can't keep a straight face. 

"That's what you first said about this whole trip and now look where we are." 

He smiles, he knows where is now and he never wants to leave. 

 === 

The next morning, "Hux you really don't need to make this," Kylo says as he leans on the counter, taking in all the ingredients laid out and judging him slightly for it. 

"Yes I do, my grandmother would make me Christmas pudding every year for me and I've made it for myself every Christmas since. I should contribute to the cooking, and I have all the ingredients to make it so why not." 

Resting his head in his hand on the counter and raising an eyebrow at him he asks, "you sure you know what you're doing? You don't need a recipe?"  

"Careful Kylo,"  he leans in a little towards Kylo, "I won't have you questioning my methods". 

He leans in a little closer to him, a certain look in his eye, "what can I do to help then?" 

"Hmmm well," he says as seductively as he can as he leans all the way in to whisper in Kylo's ear, "you can stop distracting me and go get me the flour," he pulls back with a smirk. 

He returns the smirk back to him, "right away General". 

The quiet clearing of someone's throat brings both of their attentions to the doorway where Leia is standing with a slightly amused look on her face. They shift to stand closer to one another, though it's not something to fake anymore the impulse to act is still there. 

"Good morning mom," he says as he puts a hand on Hux's lower back. 

"Good morning Leia." 

"Good morning to you too boys," she also takes in all of the ingredients and hopes he hasn't been rude coming in and using her supplies. She then looks back to the two of them and smiles, "I'm happy to see that both of you finally opened up to one another, I knew the two of you would be good for each other". 

Hux looks to Kylo who looks to him both seem just as confused as the other, "mom what are you talking about?" 

She sighs, "you think your own mother couldn't tell that the two of you were just pretending up until now. While I was a little upset that you lied to me, I could tell that you two had something, you both just didn't know yet". 

Kylo fumbles for a moment, "I...we..I just," before Hux takes over. 

"I'm sorry about all this trouble Leia, is wasn't right for us to lie to you." 

"It's okay," she steps closer to them, "I just want my son to be happy, can you do that?" she says as she tilts her head towards him and the movement reminds him of Kylo. 

"While he can be quite frustrating sometimes," he feels Kylo shift by him,  "he truly makes me happy and I will try my best to make him just as happy". 

She smiles and he knows he had the right answer, "good to hear". 

"Will the both of you stop talking like I'm not right here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter the boys get home from their trip ;)

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on my tumblr [here](http://ragingsolo.tumblr.com/)


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